Deadlock Victim

Heights.

Is anyone out there scared of heights? I am. For some reason I was thinking about that fact as I crossed the same bridge that I have crossed 5 days a week for the past 5 years going to work. I also think about it when I see tall buildings in cities, or wherever. Not sure why it popped into my head today but it did.

I'm not so sure it is heights I fear, so much as structural integrity. I have it in my head that the more something gets used, the weaker it becomes in the long run. So I am thinking, what if I am the proverbial straw that breaks the camels back? I don't like the idea of being that straw. The idea of being up in a building and looking down freaks me out, so does the idea of that building, bridge, whatever, collapsing.

This fear goes back to when I was a kid. I remember a class trip to Albany when I was in the sixth grade. One of the places we went was a skyscraper, which I, of course, refused to go up. One of the chaperones stayed with me for a bit, and then switched so he could go up to the top. Another class trip took us to the Statue of Liberty, once we got there, we discovered that politics had closed the doors to the statue and we were not allowed to climb it. This news made me very happy. One other story was when my family and I were crossing a bridge near our home, this bridge is particularly high and narrow. Traffic was heavy that day, and we ended up stopping about halfway across. Sitting there, still on the bridge, I felt it slowly swaying from side to side. Intellectually, I know that a bridge must sway, they cannot be stiff, or else they would collapse, but still...

To this day, I don't like heights. I've never been in an airplane, not that I've had a need too. I don't believe I've been higher than the tenth floor in any building. That said, i don't think it's a crippling fear, so long as I don't have to look over the edge, I think I'd be OK.

posted by Chris @ 8:18 PM