Deadlock Victim

I Had a Dream.

I know a lot of you have dreams, but mine was different. Haven't had one like this in awhile. I also know that some of you know me in the "real" world, so if you read this, please leave it here, I don't want to talk about anywhere else, thanks.

I had a dream where I met somebody, it was while shopping and she came on to me and We made plans to meet the next day. At that point I woke up and forgot most of it. The strange part was that she had more than a passing resemblance to my ex-fiancee, pictured below. I am over her, but every once in awhile I get that What If question. Things could have been a lot different if a couple of choices were made differently. We were together for 6 years, engaged for approximately 2 of those years. Things went downhill pretty quickly, and know we have a not too frequent casual friendship. Not too much communication. I want to be friends, the breakup was complicated but not cruel. I missed her for a long, long time, it was extremely hard to get over her. You're with someone for that long a time, you don't get over it in a day.

Back to the dream, it was at a Walmart or a similar kind of department store. I don't know what I was there for, but we bumped into each other, she had a friend with her, and we started talking, interest was obvious. She asked about getting together the following day, and that was about it. Somehow it just got me to thinking about the good times we had together. Whenever stories of the past come up in conversations, mine invariably include her, as we together for a long time and is involved in a large chunk of my history of the past nearly 10 years.

It just got me to thinking about being alone. Nobody likes being alone, humans are communal creatures. Sure we like having time alone, but too much of that is not good for anybody, makes it that much harder to reintegrate, so to speak. I don't have a large support network, so I may be trying to use this forum as that network.

Anyway, thanks for reading.

What happens on the net, stays on the net.

posted by Chris @ 3:40 PM